Brittle Bullet {Original Story}

[tdc456]

I figured that this story would be perfect for this website. I wrote this story about 7 months ago. I think it fits here because the title of FLCL's 5th episode inspired it- "brittle bulet." So here is the first chapter.
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Brittle Bullet
Chapter 1: The Yo-Yo

The sun sat high in the sky. Despite this, it was a fairly cool day. It seemed as if time had been passing very slowly all day long. Everyone was wondering how long it really would be until school let out. Things had progressed as normally as any other day. It was just that a strange feeling hung in the air over the school. At least for him anyway.

"Wait up Chris!!" someone shouted from down the hall. A young boy of about 16 stopped and turned around. He had medium length brown hair and bright blue eyes. He stood at 5 feet 9 inches, a pretty average height for a kid his age. He stared back at his friend Zach running up the hall towards him. Zach was only about an inch shorter than Chris with bright, long blond hair stopping just above his shoulders. He had green eyes that glinted in the afternoon sun.

"Why were you walking so fast man?" asked Zach. Chris thought about it for moment and realized that he didn't have an answer.

"I don't know," Chris replied. "I've just been feeling funny all day long. I feel like if I walk faster, the day will end quicker."

"Whatever dude," countered Zach. "Did you do the English homework? Because I didn't even bother to open the book. I'm way too lazy for my own good."

"Yeah here," paused Chris reaching into his backpack. He pulled out a piece of notebook paper with a lot of writing on it. Zach took and looked at it in amazement.

"Thanks!" exclaimed Zach. "You're a lifesaver man. See you tomorrow okay?" Zach took off to his last class of the day. They wouldn't see each other till the next day because they lived on opposite sides of town. Chris continued his awkwardly fast pace all the way through the door of his next class.

*****

Damn it, thought Chris. Only three more minutes until the day is over. He stared at the clock while concentrating hard as if it would start moving faster. Suddenly there was a small click a few rows over.

"Damn," said a voice from the other side of the class. A strange looking boy with silver hair sat in the seat the sound came from. His hair was longer on one side and covered his right eye. Chris realized that he hadn't seen this guy around school at all all year. He was playing with a yo-yo. He got mad everytime it hit the floor and made that clicking noise.

He finally managed to make rest in the air with a constant spin. The teacher stood up and walked in front of her desk next to the white board. She had a very mad expression on her face.

"Put that thing away young man," she snapped. The silver haired boy flinched at her words and snapped up the yo-yo back into his hand. He got a funny smirk on his face. He slowly raised his head and stared directly into the teacher's eyes.

"Okay," he said. He snapped his hand forward with blinding speed straight at the teacher. The yo-yo went spinning forward at her violently. When it looked as if it was at the end of its string just feet from the teacher, it kept going as if more string was appearing from nowhere. The yo-yo collided with the center of the teachers forehead. The boy snapped back the yo-yo. Her eyes rolled back and she fell to the floor. He had knocked the teacher out with a yo-yo!

What the hell is up with this kid?, thought Chris. Suddenly the boy sprang to his feet and began hopping over desks all the way to the window. He ran through and smashed through the window.

"Doesn't he know that we are on the third floor?" asked someone behind him. Chris was freaking out for just as the boy hopped his desk, it looked as if he winked at him. Chris ran for the door and out of the school after him, leaving his classmates and unconcious teacher behind.

*****

Chris stopped and leaned against the door of the abandoned warehouse that the silver haired boy had ran into. He looked at his watch. He had been trailing him for almost two hours now. Soon his parents would call him to find out where he is.

This was it. If he was gonna find out anything, he would have to go in now and confront him or risk never seeing him again. He turned and ran into the open door of the building.

Inside he saw the silver haired boy just standing by himself. But from nowhere the lights in the ware house began to come on. Once the place was lit up, he saw that there was another person there besides the two of them. The other person had strange rubber straps around his forearms. He was wearing a black long sleeve shirt and ripped blue jeans. His pitch black hair was a mess on top of his head.

The yo-yo kid turned and yelled in a frantic voice, "Why the hell did you follow me you idiot?!"

Chris wanted to turn and run but was entranced by the sight of the strapped boy. Suddenly the boy raised his arms and the rubber straps moved as if they had a will of their own. Two from each arm shot up towards the ceiling and raised the strange boy off the ground. He raised one leg to stick out straight towards Chris. His shoes had big portrusions on the back and holes in the bottom of the soles. A gunshot went off and a bullet flew out of the bottom of his shoe straight at Chris.

He prepared for the worst but the pain never came. Something had blocked the bullet. He looked down and saw the yo-yo from before smoking at his feet. It had no marks. It was almost as if it was bulletproof.

Chris looked at the yo-yo boy as he snapped the yo-yo back.
He simply said, "You're gonna hafta learn to be more careful."
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To be continued in
B.B. Chapter 2

Let me know if you want more of the chapters.

[anoncake]

it seems interesting, but what does it have to do with FlCl?

[tdc456]

I didn't say that it had anything to do with FLCL. I simply said that the title of episode 5 inspired me to write a story.

[Firestarterz]

I really like the story!

[anoncake]

I didn't say that it had anything to do with FLCL. I simply said that the title of episode 5 inspired me to write a story.

hmm...well, the submit section is really for things pertaining to flcl or the website/forum.

if you do post more, could you do it in off topic or the lounge or something? entertainment would also be suitable.

[JustFrosty]

Sorry bro but its boring.I kept trying to read it,would get 2 sentences into it,then stop.BE MORE DESCRIPTIVE AND USE WAY MORE ADJECTIVES.I WANT TO BE ENTAGLED IN THE CRYSTAL BLUE OCEAN WAVES YOU CALL A STORY BUT ITS REALLY DIFFICULT WHEN YOUR STORY LACKS WONDERFUL ADJECTIVES THAT BUILD THE MOST GLORIOUS OF SETTINGS.

EDIT-k i read it all now.For some reason i have a feeling that chris has some sort of love affixation with the yo-yo boy...

[anoncake]

eh, i thought the adjective use was just fine. most amateur writers pack too much into their stories, making it boring.

[JustFrosty]

yeah i just like a bit more description and adjectives due that nicely.His character description is good though,but he needs to be more descriptive in my opinion.Like the part were the bullet shoots from the kids shoe,i was kinda confused what happened(not what happened after but what actually happened)

[Firestarterz]

think it was very well written and had excellent dialouge, keep it up tdc!

[Bluerose]

It was really great. Keep it up. Can't wait for the other chapters.

[Revenant]

Very nice.

Want MOAR

[tdc456]

Well since I mostly got positive feedback, here is chapter 2.
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"He already found him."
"This could be troublesome. What if he helps him remember?"
"Scorpio is already taking care of it for us. He can handle them at this stage."
"Yeah...you're probably right."


Brittle Bullet
Chapter 2: The Bullet

Chris stood still dazed from what had just occured. The strange boy with straps around his arms lowered himself slowly from the ceiling. He just stared at the yo-yo boy angrily. Chris slowly raised his head to look at the man that had just saved his life.

"Here. This may help you out," said the silver-haired boy. He reached into his back pocket. "I sure hope you still know how to use one of these." The yo-yo boy threw Chris a pistol he pulled from under his shirt. Chris caught it clumsily fumbling it nervously. When he finally steadied, he looked at the pistol very afraid and his gaze kept jumping from the gun to the yo-yo boy and back again.

"N-n-no way m-man," studdered Chris frightened. "I c-can't fire a g-g-gun. There's no way."
The boy with the straps began sprinting full speed straight at Chris. He flinched and closed his eyes. The yo-yo shot out and wrapped around Chris' ankle pulling him out of the way. When it let him go, he shot back to his feet. Shaking violently, Chris raised the gun to point at the new found enemy. He closed his eyes and pulled the trigger.

*clink*

He had missed him. It hit the wall on the behind him. The enemy started laughing maniacally. It was pitched and began to scare Chris half out of his wits.

"No you idiot," said the yo-yo man. "You have to tell the bullet where to go."

"Wha-" replied Chris confused at the meaning of the sentence. "Why don't you do it since you are the one who was going to fight in the first place?"

"But I handed you the gun."

"But you had it first. Why didn't you just shoot him to begin with?"

"Where is the fun in that? Besides, you're the only one who can use that gun." He simply smiled at Chris. The first command echoed in his head, tell the bullet where to go. Like just tell it exactly what to do?

Chris was thinking too slow for he had begun charging again only faster this time. He raised the gun again only more steady. Chris once again pulled the trigger.

Almost as if he was expecting it, the enemy side-stepped the bullet. Chris immediately thought, Please just him so I don't die. The bullet was an inch from hitting the far wall when it stopped dead in its tracks and turned around. It began flying straight back at the man at the same firing speed. Before he knew what was going on, he was on the floor with a bullet halfway through his thigh.

"AH!" yelled the strange man. "Shit that hurt. What the hell was tha-" He cut himself off when he looked at the kid standing with the gun. On his forehead was a strange glowing symbol he recognized all too well. The man stood up slowly too not cause too much pain. Shit!, he thought. Leo is not going to be happy about this at all.

He turned and ran/limped out of the warehouse. Chris and the yo-yo boy ran outside to follow him but, as soon as they exited they saw he was nowhere to be found.

***one hour later***

"So what's your name?" asked Chris walking next to the yo-yo boy on the way home.

"You can call me Isaac," he replied. As they walked together, Isaac still played with his yo-yo doing dumb easy tricks. Chris was thinking through the conversation they had just had very thoroughly. It wasn't very informative. Isaac just gave very vague answers to all his questions. He figured he wouldn't figure anything out today.

"Who was that guy you were fighting?" he asked Isaac.

"With the crazy shoes?" he replied. Chris nodded in response. "He used to go by his real name. But now his only title is Scorpio."

"Scorpio?" quizzed Chris. "Like on the zodiac?"

"Exactly," answered Isaac. "He and eleven others all work together under one man. Their organization is called The Zodiac. They used to be part of a secret government project to help fight terrorism. But when it was discovered that they were genetically altering humans, the project was instantly abandoned."

Chris pondered for a few seconds. Then the obvious thought dawned on him. Something he should have asked from the very beginning.

"How do I fit into all of this?" he asked. "I mean, how did I do that back there?"

"Well..." thought Isaac. He tried to figure out a simple way to tell him.

*****

Scorpio arrived back at his headquarters. He walked up to a door with a small panel next to it. Placing his hand flat on the surface, it scanned him and confirmed his identity. The door slid open sideways with a satisfying whoosh. He walked slowly down the hall avoid injuring his leg further.

After turning corner after corner, he reached another door and entered a number code on a small pad on the doorknob. He heard a click and turned the knob, entering the room. Upon entering, it looked as if it was an army command center with tons of desks covered with electronic equipment plus a large LCD display at the front of the room.

Scorpio plopped down in a comfortable recliner and leaned his head back. His messy black hair fell back and revealed a bunch of scars on the right side of his face. A soft and light voice sounded from behind him.

"Oh no. Is Scorppy hurt?"

"Its nothing Cancer. Just a small shot wound. I'll deal with it myself," he responded.

He opened his eyes and saw the strange pink haired girl staring back at him. Cancer walked around in front of him and sat down in the other chair. Her bright purple eyes and shining pink hair contrasted vividly with the black leather clothing she wore.

"Thats what you always say," she contradicted. Cancer got a funny frown on her face. "Leo and Virgo won't be happy to hear about the kid. They'll probably go out on a massacre just to find him. Sorta like last time." Scorpio raised his head to look into her eyes.

"I'll tell them not to," he replied reassuringly. "I have information they won't refuse to hear."

*****

Chris layed down on his bed staring up at the ceiling. His thoughts raced. Isaac had told him something that would change his life forever.

"You had to have your memories erased because they thought you powerful," said Isaac. "I was sent to help you retrieve them. So we can stop The Zodiac's plan. After all, what would they do without Chris Scotreis?...

...The Bullet."
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To be continued in
B.B. Chapter 3

[Bluerose]

That is really good. Keep it up!

[Firestarterz]

pretty awesome my friend, keep 'em coming

[Revenant]

Nifty Keen man, nifty keen.